Also, I might seem like just a bubbly, happy teenager but I have very deep emotions about things. I'm so devoted to my friends and my mom and brothers. Nothing makes my day more than getting to hang out or talk to a friend. So I'm thankful for those people who understand that, and make an effort to be involved in my life. I've spent a lot of time thinking, and a lot of time talking to amazing people, and I'm going to make a conscious effort to become more involved here.
However that doesn't mean the hurt goes away. This uncertainty about if one of my best friends still wants to be involved in my life, it hurts. Just random times I'll be sitting, doing nothing in particular, and wonder if she's mad at me. When I spend more than 30 minutes with my family and some rude comment or snide remark is made, it hurts. But it brings me back to Jesus. And if that's what it takes to make me think of Him, and make me praise Him--bring it on.
My prayer is that in everything I will truly be able to see Jesus, show Jesus, or praise Jesus. Like we sang in church today "so I will come to You, offering all I do, opening up my hands, in sweet surrender." When I really stop to think about it, I can't even begin to comprehend why the heck I don't live every moment in view of how amazing He is. Today the biggest evidence of God's grace is that he shows himself to me.
Whatever's in front of me
I choose to sing Hallelujah