Oh, listen to the music

God is so good. Praise and recognition really means a lot to me. My challenge to myself this quarter was to do my job for the Lord, not for attention or competition. But, at the end of the college career, it means SO much to me to know that everything I've done for the past 2 years has been noticed. Recognition is just God's way of telling me "hey, you're doing alright!"

Now, I use this blog for two main reasons: to chronicle what's happening in my life because I tend to forget what life used to be like, and to keep my bestie who's in India right now apprised of what's happening in my life. The rest of this post is going to be mainly the first reason...so if you don't like people talking about themselves, now would be a good time to stop reading.

Still here? awesome. In the past few weeks I've received the following:

• Dean's Scholar
• Graduating Magna Cum Laude
• Com Department Excellence in Research award
• Lovely poster from RHLC
• RHA/NRHH Outstanding Leadership Pin 
• RHA cords
• Programming Hall of Fame
• West Basetties Program of the Year award
• Hats off to ya' award

Dean's Scholar--this ties in directly with graduating Magna Cum Laude. Basically, I had decent grades while I was here at CWU. Because of said grades, I'm graduating not only with honors but as one of 34 people in the entire College of Arts and Humanities to be a Dean's Scholar. I'm blown away. I think grades are the factor that determines who is awarded this, but one of my good friends, Eli, has great grades and didn't get Dean's Scholar.....so not sure exactly what factors in to the decision.

Com Excellence in Research--Since I'm doing original research for my senior thesis, I received this award. Apparently, receiving an award at the Com banquet is a big deal. Not everyone wins something. I have worked my behind off on my thesis, so it feels wonderful to see that my professors recognize the work I put in.

RHLC poster--several of my residents wrote not just little "have a good year" notes, but full paragraphs about how much they appreciate me. One said something to the effect of "if I could create an RA from scratch, they would be just like you." As an RA, there are people who just won't like you. And that's tough for me to deal with, since I live with them every day and try to have a positive relationship. To hear that kind of thing, makes this job SO worth it.

RHA/NRHH Outstanding Leadership Pin--this is the one that brought me to tears because I was not expecting it in a million years. RHA is the Residence Hall Association. NRHH is their sister organization. Basically, we plan programs, help residents, spread the word about things, etc. I've been an advisor this year and part of last year as an RA. Every year the executive boards can award a total of 8 outstanding leadership pins and 8 bronze pins. Out of everyone at RHA and NRHH, Brett chose to pick me for his outstanding leadership pin. This is a huge honor. He said "I was surprised this person hasn't been recognized at this level yet. She has an incredible community and just spreads joy wherever she goes. Even though she isn't part of NRHH, I would like to award this pin to Anna..." I think the coolest thing about this is that I don't really know Brett. So apparently, the light that Jesus has allowed me to be is spreading beyond what I realize.

with Brett after being awarded the OL pin

RHA cords--basically, it's honors cords for all the work I've put into RHA. Considering I've led several RHLC meetings by myself, and helped with a ton of little things (when no other staff members consistently did), I'm super excited to be graduating with the support of RHA.

Programming Hall of Fame--basically I did a lot of programs. A lot. Only Khylee and I ever got that from Beck. This year.

Program of the Year--The Green Dot program that Nicole, Andrea, and I worked so hard on, and got such great staff and student participation received campus-wide recognition!

Hats off to ya'--this is another one that almost brought me to tears. One of the people I admire the most here  is one of our Assistant Directors of Housing, Jenna Hyatt. She is an incredible woman of faith and is genuinely sweet and caring. She said she has gotten to award this for 15 years, to 3 people on the housing staff team each year. 3 out of over 120 staff. She awarded one to me and her words were: for integrity, outstanding leadership, and said "I could tell you 1,000 stories of why this person deserves it." I am just blown away by how much of an honor it is to receive recognition from such a wonderful woman.

That's been my last few weeks. Every day I'm just so blessed. I feel like God is looking down and saying "you did well." And the best part is that hopefully some of these people know, like I've told my boss, that I don't compare myself to others. I hold myself to a standard of excellence because I'm doing my work for Jesus--not for other people.

As of now, there are 7 days until I graduate.

VIRGIN Jell-o shots with my girls (Nicole, Riley, and me)

3rd floor RAs....we're just THAT epic

Straight thuggin' at the Bassetties BBQ

Seasons come and go, but I will never change

Well let's see...I have 3 weeks till graduation. Crazy. I'm convinced that this entire quarter is one big test to see if we can remember to jump through all the hoops. There are a million things to do before closing the residence hall, I have so many papers due this week, and job applications are exhausting. I shouldn't be blogging, I should be getting paper to finish my portfolio. :)

In a few short weeks these little deadlines and homework assignments won't be a big deal anymore. It's just odd. I'm really really going to miss my residents. They are so fun and just easy to hang out with. I was watching Glee, and one of the characters put it well when she said "I just don't want all of it to end."

BUT, on the cool side, I passed my dispatcher exam with pretty darn good scores. But the best part is that most of the agencies who are hiring are in the same area or city as a Mars Hill church! As scary as re-locating and starting over is, I feel like if I'm in a place where I can be at Mars Hill again, there will be a family there.

We found love in a hopeless place

Let's be honest. Life gets ahead of you sometimes. In trying to stay on top of everything, I'd lost sight of Jesus. That and I didn't care. Some people call it a "dry spell in your faith" but here's what it was for me. I knew God is awesome. I knew He was always around. I knew He was giving me everything I had. I prayed when I was thankful or needed something. But beyond that I didn't feel compelled to spend time with Him. 

It's like when you're working out every day and then you take a break. That one day turns into two, and since working out takes so much time you realize that you don't need to do it ALL the time. After all, you seem to be in decent shape when you're not a regular visitor. But then you start going back every day because you feel like crud, and the daily workouts feel so good and make you feel solid. That's where I'm at right now. Physically and spiritually.

Ask Jesus to work and He will. I have a list of things I've been convicted of. Want to hear them? Great. I'm glad you do. I need to work on: being a servant, changing my views of femininity, my tendency to jump to defensiveness, using my time well, watching what I say, and more. Pretty good list, I'd say. So far, I've seen tiny little baby steps of progress. 

Also, today my advisor/head of the department/public speaking professor pulled my 2 best Communication Major friends and I aside after class and asked us to help him in a seminar about public speaking. I was blown away. I took advanced public speaking with him, but didn't think I was near one of the top 3 speakers in the department. The other big blessing I got in the mail was a letter saying I'm a Dean's Scholar. Apparently, there are 34 students in the College of Arts and Humanities who qualify. I appreciate that God shows me He notices all the little things I do. 

I think the hardest thing on my list of convictions is the servanthood. It's about doing the extra work and not complaining. It's kind of integrity. Like when I go on duty and there is a week of old posters that haven't been taken down/put up--that's frustrating to me since it's the other RAs job to do that. But just fixing the problem with out whining to people afterwards....that's being a servant. Or talking the people that others seem to avoid. Or helping out wherever I can. It's tough because deep down I have a problem being "inconvenienced". But God is good in helping me change.

Evidences of God's Grace:

• beautiful weather
• the Japanese Garden
• good people winning the ASCWU BOD election
• raising $45 for an orphanage through our Pie Your RA program
• class cancelled today
• my computer is over 4 years old and still working
• a wonderful chat with Nicole
• seeing Kelsie even with her new job

There's a song that's inside of my soul

Last night I had a program where we watched a movie called Miss Representation. It's all about how women are portrayed in the media and what that's doing to their self-image. Now anyone that knows me knows that I fully believe that women are just as talented as men. However, I've been struggling with the whole concept of gender roles. People always say things like "only a tiny percentage of women are CEOs. We need to fix that." Do we? Really?

My Bible says that God made men and women different, but equal. When it talks about being different, it mentions how exemplary women (like the Proverbs 31 woman) are really good at keeping their homes in order. So I wonder if deep down, women desire to be with their kids and working at home? That's definitely not to say that they shouldn't be allowed to have jobs. On the contrary, I think that ladies who can work and take care of their homes are incredible. But I know that I'm so excited for the day that I can have a family. For when I will have my own house and husband to take care of. I have no desire to be a CEO. Even in law enforcement, I can see myself doing specialty teams like K-9 or working closely with domestic violence/sexual assault, but I wouldn't want to be high up in supervisory.


I don't know if I've shared this before, but the reason I want to be a police officer isn't that I want to prove how tough I am. The reason is that I see so many people hurting. Every day people are being hurt and I am so sick of not being able to do anything. I want to see justice. Volunteering as an advocate with a domestic violence and sexual assault group in town has been an eye-opening experience. I'll never forget the first sexual assault call (and only, actually) I went on. I met the professional advocate on-call at the hospital, heard the victim's story, and more than anything I was mad. I was mad that some person has such a low view of human life that he did this to someone. I was mad that I couldn't give the perp a piece of my mind. I was mad that no one who was there and saw what was going on decided to stop the situation. When I get really upset I usually express it by running or dancing. It was too late to go the gym so I spent about 10 minutes doing PT exercises.

That's just one experience. I don't know that victim. I have never seen them since that night. But I've heard stories. Oh, have I ever heard the stories. You know, you hear the stats that 1 in 6 women will be sexually assaulted in their lives which means that you probably know a victim, etc. I had no idea how true that was. Especially with my advocate training, people will tell me things they've never told anyone. It breaks my heart at how many of the perps are never brought to justice.

The same thing with domestic violence. I have heard SO many stories. Not only from the victims that I have helped through volunteering. My friends. My residents. Some of the nicest people, most godly women, most incredible ladies have gone through or seen terrible things. People ask me how a loving God could allow so many bad things to happen. I can only take heart in the fact that when Jesus comes back to reign and rule over our crappy and sinful world, he will get rid of Satan and he will bring ultimate justice.

I said I was going to post on passion, and this is it. I firmly believe that God gives everyone a deep rooted thing that they care about. One of my friends really loves mentally handicapped children. Another friend is fighting to end human trafficking.This is what I'm passionate about. This is what my best friends understand about me. This is what my residents/acquaintances try to comprehend. This is what my future man will have to "get". Because until you can fully comprehend the fact that I would do almost anything to help people, you'll never understand me as a person. I'll never know why, but the personality Jesus has given me is one that drives and pushes for excellence. When all the bad guys are caught, that's when I'll be content.

I'm doing a program about ending power-based violence (a.k.a. Green Dot) next week. One of my incredible residents, Nicole, is doing it with me. Nicole is a lady who has grown incredibly this year. She and I had a conversation mid-Fall quarter about being Christian in college. That conversation led to some very difficult things, at times we've both wanted to quit or give up. Now, she's thriving. She might not see it but I do. She is involved with church, talks with her mentors and peer-mentors, sees things more and more from Jesus' perspective, and is strong enough to stand up for herself. It's people like her that give me hope.

One more story and then I promise I'll be done. The other night I was dealt with an interesting situation. At the end, the person involved called me and sounded so happy. They literally sounded 10 pounds lighter. They told me "thank you SO much. I am so relieved and so happy to be out of that situation. I feel so good right now!" That makes it worth it.

P.S. I'm excited about graduation, but I'm SUPER excited to do this again:

Are we human or are we dancers?

This is my Friday afternoon. I was going to do Zumba with Katie, but my phone didn't go off to remind me, and I got lost in trying to catch up on my TV shows via Hulu while working on my thesis. I didn't realize how many professors would not be okay with me taking 6 minutes of their class time...crazy.

Anyway, it's been a productive week. Research on its way, Green Dot program all planned and ready for Wednesday, and we're having an area staff event on Sunday where we're all recognizing a member of our team. And I made my recognition thing for Bossman.

So this evening, I was not very tired, but trying to figure out a relaxing way to finish my night after doing a nice ab workout and watching some Friday Bride Day on TLC with my ressies. That's when I came up with the brilliant idea of searching YouTube for a short beginner yoga/relaxation exercise. Now, I've heard all kinds of things about yoga within the Christian church. Most often I hear it condemned. I understand where the spiritual/clearing your mind of everything/meditation could be not-God-honoring. However, when I've done yoga (and it's not very often) it's never for a spiritual purpose. Usually, it was for the workout and the fact that it's relaxing. So the jury is still out for me on what I think of it. I'm leaning towards it's okay--when done like any other workout or relaxation activity.

I was thinking about another thing. Passion. Not necessarially the romantic type. But my thoughts are going to take up a whole post, so I'll leave that one for tomorrow-ish.

these should be the best days of our lives

"So slow it down you move a little too fast

You take a deep breath, you make this last

These should be the best days of your life"

It's just been a whirlwind of stuff. I picked dates to test as a dispatcher and corrections officer in May. Police officer testing will be in June. It's so exciting. Still scary, but the dispatch and corrections tests aren't nearly as nerve-wracking as police officer testing. It's just weird that this could be the rest of  my life. People keep asking how I feel about graduation and my answer is always the same--I'll feel better once I have a job.

Also! I got my research approved! So excited. I have to figure out what communication theories are present in my study and then I'm set. Again, it's really weird to be doing these "end of your college career" things.

Yeah, that's my college graduation cap and gown. I found out I'll be graduating magna cum laude which means I have to choose between the silver and CWU tassel. I remember that after high school graduation, I put the tassel on my car's rearview mirror...Wow graduation is coming too soon.

Until that fateful day, life has been full of hanging out with residents, programming, sitting through classes, doing little bits of homework here and there, spending time with friends, and the most recent addition has been weekly nights at the bar with my staff team. 

This one's for you and me livin' out our dreams

I forgot to post my picture yesterday...sorry! Yesterday's item was mail. And since I've been working on graduation announcements, it was perfect timing.

Yes. Those are Christmas stamps. When I was at my parent's house, I asked if they had any stamps and they did. Sure, they're the wrong season, but they're free! Speaking of mail, I got a letter in the mail from miss Cortney which just made my day. There are few things which make me feel as loved and appreciated as getting a letter via snail mail. 

Today was an interesting day. It's my slow day so I should have gotten a lot accomplished....well I kinda did. Tied up several RA loose ends that needed to be done. Worked a little on my paper. That's about it. But I love Wednesdays because I have a meeting with the leadership teams from all the residence halls and with my hall's leadership team. Usually my boss helps run our hall's meeting since we're both "advisors" but tonight he couldn't make it. So I got to have the "we need to be doing our jobs better" conversation without him. I think it went well....the rest of the meeting worked out. 

The funny thing about those conversations and the similar ones I have with residents about breaking policy is I always wonder how seriously they take the convo. I mean, most of the time I'm a joyful, smiley person.I don't see a point in being serious unless I need to be. My favorite thing from Jesus is joy. So I try to be nice. Even in confrontations I generally head towards the "I need to tell you this, but don't hate me" style. I can be the authoritative person....ask any Explorer or some of my ressies...I just choose not to be. Anyway, but when the ressies walk away from those conversations I'm always curious if they think it was a joke or if they realize that's my way of telling them nicely to cut it out.

Today's photo assignment was: someone who makes you happy.

I could pretty much open my door yell "I need somebody!" and pick any one of the people that comes flocking towards me.

Easy.

This is Kelsie. I picked her for so uber many reasons. She's one of my residents and I really can't remember how we first met outside of the mandatory meetings. It might have been during the leadership council meetings or when she came to church with me. ANYway, one of my favorite things about Kelsie is her laugh. She makes me giggle. I was upstairs in the SURC one day and could hear her laugh all the way in the dining area. And she's super cute. I like surrounding myself with beautiful people :)

But probably my favorite thing about Kelsie is her character. She loves Jesus and it's a beautiful thing. She is joyful, caring, trustworthy, hard-working, dedicated to excellence, has integrity, and is someone that I'm very excited to call a friend once she's no longer my ressie. The physical test for ROTC (which she's part of) is very similar to the police force so we trained together last quarter. There's just something about having her there that makes me want to do my best. We struggle with different areas, so she definitely pushes me beyond where I feel like I can go. When I tested for my last agency, I ran the 1.5 mile the very best I could to honor two people: Deputy C and Kelsie. She might be younger than me, but I've learned a lot from her. Also, she will be an RA next year. I am SO excited for her. I feel like we're very similar in some ways so she'll have all the best qualities that I brought to the position and more. She'll be that RA who all her girls adore and the guys respect. Anyway, I like this kid a lot. I eat with/workout/see her a lot and every time I always feel so good afterwards.

One last thing before I head off. I have to lose about....11 pounds to be able to test with State Patrol. It's probably time I got rid of the spring break chub anyway. I decided to really minimize starches for a while. So now I'm eating a lot of salads, steamed veggies and shrimp, smoothies, juice, fruit, salted nuts, straight protein, etc. I'm also trying to severely cut down on sugar. So far I'm doing well. already down a couple of pounds and it's been 2 days.

So there's my long post! :)

Evidences of God's Grace:

• beautiful weather
• talking to Jill before she left the country!
• letter from Cortney
• mini worship sesh before class
• a good workout
• sticking with my food limits today
• only having one class

Return of the Ducklings

This is always one of my favorite days of the quarter. Everyone is coming back from their spring breaks and I get to hear all the stories! I love seeing my  resident's happy shining faces because (most of them) are excited to be back. They tell me all about their adventures but it ends with "but I've missed you so much!" And I love hearing noise all around me again. People are talking everywhere! And I missed the "Anna I have a question for you" moments. Or the "Anna I need you to____." And I've missed the happy smiling faces that pass my door all the time. So yeah, I'm glad they're back.

The big green chair has already gotten two uses for the quarter. Best RA investment EVER. If you haven't met my chair, it is the perfect combo of fuzzy and soft and you sink into it just perfectly and it's big enough that you can fit 2 people, or curl up in it, or whatever your little heart desires.

But anyway, today has been great. Evidences of God's Grace:

• pudding cup
• cheap paper for grad announcements
• laughing with residents
• having good conversations
• Kelsie