Shifts

It occurred to me that not everyone understands work schedules that aren't the normal 9am-5pm so let me enlighten you. 

I work swing shift. It means that I don't start work until well into the afternoon. (I'm not posting my exact schedule online, sorry). So for "normal" people, if you wake up at, say, 6am you need to go to bed around 10pm to get your 8 hours of sleep. Now, if you work till,say, midnight (because you're on swing shift), I can guarantee that you're not going to be able to fall asleep immediately after work. At least not if you're in a field like mine where lives depend on the fact that you are alert and thinking until the very end of your shift. So my guess is the average person would be asleep by 3am. 8 hours of sleep takes you to 11am. And that is IF you're not working overtime or delayed by something. 

So, my dear friends, getting up in the middle of the afternoon might not be your "normal", but it doesn't mean I'm being lazy or sleeping in every day. Don't tell me I'm lucky....I'm just getting my 8 hours like everyone else. Probably less actually. So when people act like I should just be able to get up at 8am to meet them somewhere, it makes me frustrated. I'm not being difficult--just imagine being told you needed to wake up at 2 or 3am on a work day....

Ok ok rant over.

You take brokenness aside and make it beautiful

I believe that the world is a beautiful place. I have to. 

At the risk of sounding conceited, I'm going to say it anyway--I have a really hard job. This week I spent 20 hours listening to people's problems. As 911 operators we are taught to let it roll off you. Someone starts yelling at you because the police didn't respond the first time they whined about the noise next door? Let it go. Someone starts ranting about how terrible you are at your job? Let it go. Someone starts getting impatient because you ask them to repeat things? Let it go. Your officer asks you for the third time to repeat that plate? Let it go. Your officer gets frustrated because you aren't fast enough? Let it go. Your officer isn't paying attention to his radio? Let it go.

This week I hit a point with a couple calls where I couldn't let it go. I can still hear her voice ringing in my ears. The sound of her desperately trying to keep it together for her small child while the horror of what just happened starts creeping in. The panic turning to tears. "I'm going to burn these clothes." 

I have to believe the world is a beautiful place, because I know it's full of dirty, broken things. I have first hand knowledge of what human beings can do to each other. I also know that the world is beautiful because of its creator. People are imperfect, rotten, and evil. Jesus loves people so much that he made an incredible sacrifice. God made the flowers. He made the blue sky and the beach. He made pristine snow and puppies to romp through it. He makes beautiful things out of dust. He takes brokenness aside and makes it beautiful.

Some people call it optimism, others say "oh don't worry, with time you'll become cynical like us." I have to believe the world is a beautiful place because I don't WANT to be like them. I want to always care about how that CPR in progress call ended. I want my heart to always hurt when someone goes to jail. I love what I do. It really has to be a field you're called into, not just a job. Friends and family will never know how it drains you, how you can differentiate between types of crying over the phone. You tell them the funny stories because those are the ones you want to remember.

I believe the world is a beautiful place. Because I have to.

Dance all night, there's no end in sight

Okay, here I go. God is SO good. It's been really easy for me to forget that I'm only where I'm at right now because God made all the little things fall into place. I just finished my first phase of training at work. I'll actually miss training a lot because our trainer was amazing and the three of us who were being trained had a blast together. Now I move to phase 2--answering live calls all day every day.

It's an incredible job. Every day I answer a 911 line that connects people to the help they need. Sometimes we save lives. It's MUCH more difficult than I thought it'd be, but it's also really exciting. So starting tomorrow I'm working full 10-hour days. woooo

I just e-mailed someone at church about finding a new community group....I'm SO excited about that.

I should be moving into an apartment in early October. !!!!!

I heard from the soldier I adopted and I'm blown away by how much he appreciates the little things that we do. It's such a rewarding thing.