It's so good to be alive in such a hazardous world/To be alive and see the victory unfurled

Today little guide dog puppy Simba came over for part of the week. He's a darling little 13-week-old black lab. All legs, big floppy ears, and he loves pouncing around the floor. Since he's just a baby we're not going many places with him. He's going to Starbucks with me when I hang out with Cortney today, and Tully's tomorrow when I hang out with Sam. Oh, and to Eburg on Weds for the job interview.

I also got to meet with a deputy at Sammamish Police Department to talk about starting an explorer post. She especially wanted to find out what we do exactly and what would be the selling points to get people interested in joining the post. I'm really excited for them! It'll be great to have a post on the plateau and hopefully it'll be some good competition for Redmond. I also offered to help out with mock scenes on the off-weeks if they'd like. So cool! It was fun just to talk through why I've loved being an Explorer. Like one of her questions is what was the biggest thing I've learned? I think it's just having that self confidence when you walk into a room that "I'm an officer so I'm not going to let you walk all over me." Sure, I'm not an officer yet but that's an attitude we're taught from day 1 because it can be hard to actually develop that strong presence. And learning to balance that with being a person who it's easy to talk to....I guess I just value myself more than I did before. That like I've said on here before about how I learned at Academy how to push yourself. Like I remember our 2nd night, we were all exhausted and had just gotten done with evening formation. After evening formation we went to TAC time where basically they could do whatever they wanted with us. We'd been running, doing 6-inch leg lifts, pushups, etc all day and then our TACs decided to take us on a run. We had no idea how far we were going to go, we just had to find some reserve of energy and go. And our head TAC led the run so he set a pretty quick pace. And we did even more PT after the little run.

6 days ladies and gentlemen.

Redmond Explorers: "Born to lead!"

Last meeting with my wonderful post today. I will miss that group so so much. But I will see them in December :) I wanted to go on a ridealong with one of our advisors before I left, but she said she's not taking any right now so I'm going to see if I can get one with two of my TACs at Academy and have offered to give rides if I wanted.


I've been doing some online back-to-school clothes shopping! I haven't bought new clothes in...over a year. So it's fun!


Today God showed his grace and humor while I was driving home from Explorers. That's all I'm going to say.

Repentance, textbooks, and 16-passenger vans

We talked a lot about reaching out to non-Christians and sharing our faith with them today. When I was reading through the Radical Reformission by Mark Driscoll, this quote stuck out to me that came to mind when we were talking about being on mission in our areas:

As long as Christians fail to repent of self-righteousness, we will continue to speak of evangelism in terms such as outreach which implies we will not embrace lost people but will keep them at least an arm's length away...Repentance enables us to kneel humbly with fellow sinners at the foot of the cross so they can see Jesus without our pride rising up to encumber their view.

In other news, I ordered 2 of my textbooks today. This fall my classes will all be pretty sweet and I'm excited to get started!

I was thinking about Academy again, trying to keep memories fresh. And I was remembering the last day, Sunday, Graduation day, and we all woke up with this kind of "whatever" mood. Like what can they do to us today? Nothing we haven't done already. No one yelled at us in the mess hall, and I don't think I did any pushups all day. Instead, we all carpooled over to the rec center and practiced marching in to graduation and how the ceremony would go. Getting there was an adventure since we didn't have a Redmond officer to drive us. We ended up riding in vans with other posts and my van was crammed full of guys. There will probably 20 people in our 16 passenger van. But for some reason I managed to get put in the shot gun seat so I had it easy :) And on the ride over I had a great time talking to a deputy about why he joined a county department instead of city. He didn't have a reputation for being the easiest person to talk to so I was half scared to be stuck next to him the whole ride but he turned out to be pretty cool. Goes to show you can't believe everything you hear :)

Beginning of the End

I've started the process of saying goodbyes. :( It's funny because it's not really like they're actually goodbyes to me, it's more like we're just hanging out before I get ridiculously busy. But they ARE goodbyes. I am making a point of getting pictures with everyone so that I can re-do my photo collage with the people that I actually care about in this phase of my life, lol.

Last night we had an Explorer meeting and I really can't get over how much I will miss that group. It's only been a few months, but they've been amazing months. I'm wondering how possible it would be to get a post started in Eburg. Hmmmm....

Oh, and I'm studying Galatians right now. And it's pretty cool because I'm reading this commentary by Martin Luther and it talks about how we always need to remind ourselves about Christ's righteousness because we forget it way too easily. And that's so true! It's so easy to just follow the world's righteous standards, but it's good to keep renewing my mind.

Academy Memories (part 2)

I was thinking about Academy again today. The very last day of actual work we were all kind of squirrely. We didn't have classes, we did have a lot of fun things to do, and no one was really making us do pushups for anything. So we went out to the lawn to study for our big final exam. Our TACs told us they really wanted the academic ribbon every day, even if we didn't win anything else. So the pressure was on us to score well on our final tests. We ended up settling into two different groups to study. One spent their entire time playing around, and then there were 4 or 5 of us who actually sat down and studied. Inbetween quizzing each other, though, we got some good talking in and it made me even sadder to leave my boys.

I started packing up my room yesterday. Not the stuff that I AM taking with me, just the stuff I won't need. I figure if I pack it up now then in these 3 final weeks I can make adjustments as needed. It's crazy weird though to see my walls almost bare and these three big boxes in the middle of my room :(

Academy Memories (part 1)

I don't really want to write a new post because I want Academy to be at the top forever. But since that's not practical, I'm writing something new! Yay me!

I've been house sitting for the last week, so I've been living out of  a duffel bag for 2 weeks. And it's SO nice to be at my house again! The funny thing is that while I was house sitting, I'd get these random feelings like I should be doing pushups. So I did. See, at Academy we would wake up, get ready for the day and get our rooms clean for inspection and then we'd run out to formation. After morning formation we'd go to breakfast. During meals, we would wait in line with our heads down, studying the previous day's class notes. If we were caught looking around, the TAC officers would yell at us, but at the same time if we were so oblivious that we missed a TAC officer trying to get through a line and neglected to yell "make a hole!" then we'd also get in huge trouble. At any point during the meal, if any Explorer in the room screwed something up--whether it was addressing an officer incorrectly or bumping in to a TAC--everyone would be on their faces doing pushups. Usually it was in sets of 10 but some mistakes REALLY made TACs mad... like if someone addressed a female officer as "sir" (an easy mistake to make when you spend most of the day saying 'yes sir') or if all the Explorers neglected to serve a TAC in a timely manner.

During the day, if we were inbetween classes and one of our TACs walked by and saw us talking at all, we'd be on our faces doing pushups. One day, one of our TACs saw us studying (or pretending to study) during our break and told us we studied too much. So he had us doing PT over the break. That's just how Academy went. If one of our four TACs thought we should be doing some sort of physical work, we did it. I'd say we did less PT because of mistakes that people made and more just because the TACs were bored :)

Twice during the week we got our guide-on (our platoon's flag) stolen and once someone got our mascot. We had to do crazy/dumb things to get them back. One time we sang "I'm a little teapot" (which our TACs lovingly recorded and put on Facebook), once we did "Party in the USA" complete with dance moves and hand motions, and once we surrounded a deputy (who got our flag) and made a kid in our group who looked like Justin Bieber sing the chorus of a JB song to her.

Good times. I'm trying to get out of the "I wish I was back at Academy" mindset, but it's hard. When we were there, if we did a good job we were rewarded. Some of us earned the respect of our TACs, and all of us definitely respected/feared them. It was kind of that perfect world where good triumphs over evil and although people are occasionally mean just for the heck of it, it was rarely ever personal. Most of it was just to break us down and build us back up as stronger people who worked together as a team. I decided life would be awesome if instead of parents, I could just have my TAC Officers fill the parental role :) (jk, I love my parents most of the time, too)

One more thing. I thought I'd explain the significance of the title of the post below this one. "If not now, then when? If not me, then who?" This was a quote that Officer H gave us on Friday of Academy. It kind of sums up the job of a police officer and it really stuck in my head. On Saturday we did mock scenes, the physical agility test, and shot at the range. Mock scenes are basically when we're given scenarios with actors who play out a scene that an officer might encounter and we have to react as an officer would (which is what the Apple Cup in May was, a bunch of scenes that we were graded on). The thing is, mock scenes kind of scare me because I'm afraid of doing something really wrong. So when we were at Apple Cup, I was really glad to have Tyler, my partner, take the lead officer role on almost all the scenes. At Academy, I had more experience than my partners so I agreed to take lead officer but it petrified me because if we screwed up it was my fault.

I remember SO clearly as we began our first scenario, a building search with a prospective burglary in progress, I stood outside of the door waiting to knock and announce and felt SO un-prepared. But that quote came to mind, if not now then when? If  I don't just do it now, when will I ever be ready to take on the challenge? If I'm not ready now, when will I ever be? I have the training, I just need to get in there and do it. If not me, then who? If I don't get in there and do this search, who will? I know I can do it because I am confident that this is a calling God has put on my life. And He will walk with me through everything I need to do. So if I don't do this job then who can I expect to do it? That quote will stick with me for the rest of my career, I'm sure.

"If not now, then when? If not me, then who?"

Explorer Academy was last week. I can't explain exactly what I learned. It's like I'm a new person, and yet the same. When I put on my uniform now, I feel so much more respect for it and for the job that it signifies. I went to Academy to prove to myself that I have what it takes to make it through a week of hell. I came back wanting to do this job more than before.

My TACs (the officers who were in charge of our small groups) were unusually amazing. Deputy C, my main TAC, could be a real tough guy and pushed us physically and emotionally. I discovered I can go way farther than I ever thought I could. At the same time though, Deputy C really cared about each of us and wanted us to succeed. So did our other TACs. So my Basic Academy was different than most people's. Sure we worked hard, but we wanted to. We did our best to make our TACs proud, and they in turn didn't make us do pushups just for the heck of it.

Like I said before though I really can't put into words what I came away with. I value life more, I appreciate authority in a different way, I feel like many of my peers are just floating through life and wish they could experience Academy, too. And I respect the people who push themselves to achieve their personal best--no matter what the field.

Our platoon (16 of us) won the group academic award every day. We also did well at drill down (drill and ceremony competition) and Esprit de Corps (skits showing teamwork and spirit). At Academy graduation on Sunday, awards were handed out to individuals in Academics, Firearms, and Physical Agility as well as for the overall most well-rounded Explorer. I was shocked when I won 3rd place in Basic Academics, 3rd in Basic Female Physical Agility, and 1st in Basic Firearms. After graduation, when I said goodbye to all my TACs, my female TAC told me that in a few years she could see me doing her job. And that made the whole week worthwhile to me.

um...later

I haven't been that busy, and yet I find myself putting off the things I should be doing first. For instance, why is reading a spy novel and watching this week's episode of White Collar so much more important than sitting down and spending some time with Jesus? Answer= it's not. I think part of my problem is that when I'm watching a movie or reading a book, my brain gets to check out. When I'm hanging with friends, I'm just having fun. And spending time with Jesus is hard work because I'm always thinking. Still, I recognize that's not a good excuse, so I will push myself back into Exodus. (and don't tell me to read something else that I find more interesting, because Exodus has been one of the most interesting books I've read)

46 days till I leave for college. I am now Facebook friends with my roommate, and she seems normal enough :) No word on the job-front. I have an application to fill out for an on-campus job, but I don't want to be offered a job there before I get a chance to hear back from the other places I applied, so i'm going to wait a little while to turn it in.

I could keep blogging for hours about how much I miss Caroline and Jill, how sad I am that Jessie moved yesterday, and what the Explorer post is up to this week, but I think I'm going to actually sit down and read my Biblia.

Ow

I went to the doctor for my annual check-up. (I haven't had an annual check up in 4 years) I highly dislike doctors. The office smells nasty--that super sterile smell that they try to cover up with spray stuff from a can. And then you sit and wait and they tell you you're not going to die any time soon...which they can't really know because THEY don't control it, God does. Anyway my doctor told me that my stupid shoulder problem is rotator cuff tendinitis. That's a verbose way of saying I have issues and should stop doing push-ups as soon as the shoulder starts hurting. I also got (a) shot in my shoulder, so now my left arm will be sore all day.

In other news, my ride-along yesterday was great. Got to see what being a Redmond cop is really like. I don't think I'm allowed to go into details, but the siren is loud, the car goes really fast, and after a few hours I didn't even feel the Kevlar vest. My officer advisor is a great guy, and it was cool to see him work. AND he said he's going to try and get me some time with the K-9 officer...which would be amazing.

That's about it. I finished reading James and decided to go read some stories, so now I'm discovering the ever-faithful God of Exodus.

Today I get to have a ride-along with my officer advisor. Heh heh. I'm super excited, but super nervous. It'll be 10 hours (2-midnight) of seeing what a real shift is like. Ayeayeaye.

Sunburns, sweat, and silliness

Ok, I suck at updating. Let's see...it's been absolutely lovely weather this past week! A few days in the 80s, a few days in the 90s, I love it! Part of the fun of not having a job is the ability to just grab a book, lay out in the sun, and read. Right now I'm at about my half-way point. Meaning that half of my summer is over. Once it becomes August, I'll stop applying for jobs because it won't be worth my time anymore...I'd spend too much time training and not enough time working.

Thursday I met with the people at the church where I'm directing the drama portion of their VBS. It sounds like it'll be a good week...I've missed playing with kids all summer! That afternoon I helped with the SWAT training for RPD which was a little slow at first, but once we started enacting scenarios, it was much more fun. I got carried out by SWAT once, and got to see how long it would take them to find me many times. They're amazing, and I feel very very safe having been a part of that!

On Friday Sam, Janda, and I trekked into Seattle and hung out in the U-district. I love Sam. And Sam loves Janda. So it was a good day.

I was going to go to a concert that night but it was too hot, and in a kind of sketchy part of Seattle, so I decided to take Janda home early. I love that dog.

Saturday allll day I worked security at Derby Days with the Explorer post. Those are the greatest kids. First I was directing traffic and answering dumb parking questions and then I got moved to the race track. We were supposed to make sure no one crossed the track while the bikers were racing, and we didn't have any problems. So I ended up just talking with Jake for a while. He's a cool kid. I know I'm not that much older than most of them, but I still feel like they're "my boys".

After 14 hours in uniform, and a really great sunburn on my face, I got to hang out with some of the cg girls, and then sleeeeeeeep.

Sunday Sutter left for guide dog training. Super sad. But it made me realize that I really want another puppy. So I e-mailed the disability people at Central, trying to make my case for why they should make me an exception and let me raise a puppy on campus. So we'll see how that goes.

Applied for a few more jobs today, went on a 3-mile run, bought my bedding set for school, shopped for shorts with Small, and bought smoothies at Tully's with Small.

It's been a good summer.

Educated beyond intelligence

I'm not going to lie: today hasn't been a great day. This hasn't been a great week. Not to say today was an awful day, it just wasn't the best. I have this massive group project that's half due tomorrow. I've done SO much work on it, we'd better get a good grade!! I feel like everyone helped out and then left me to finish it off. *sigh* so I'm exhausted and will feel 76% better once the paper is turned in tomorrow.

On another note, my old geology prof came in to the restaurant today. She comes in frequently and we always have a good chat. She's so much more of a friend and less of a prof now. Another happy thing is that I'm done with school on the 18th. Unfortunately, I have a TON of stuff to do between now and then, but it's half a month away! I also re-did a paper which I think I received an unfair grade on, and changed my grade from a C- to an A-!! I also wrote a star paper on the Arizona SB 1070 law, and I'm very proud of it. :)

So in the next 2 weeks I have 2 more papers, 2 finals, 1 group project presentation, 2 final performance presentations, 4 nights of work, along with working as traffic control for Duvall Days with the Explorer post, an Explorer meeting, watching Iron Man 2 with Kalee, lunch with Jessie, some sort of meal with Kirsten, at least lunch but probably more with Emily, an Oceanography field trip to Alki Beach, all-Saturday voice rehearsal, a guide dog meeting, community group, children's ministry chaos Sunday, and a scholarship luncheon. So if I neglect to contact you, or seem to vanish off the face of the earth, this is why. *snore*

P.S. you guys suck at reminding me to read my Bible.

Begin: Hebrews

I decided that I'm going to start reading through Hebrews. This may not be a good idea as Pastor Mark is going through Luke and I've (occasionally) been listening to the sermon series through Ecclesiastes, but I haven't read Hebrews in a while, so I think I'll camp out for now.

I have 2.5 weeks left of school. In those 2.5 weeks, I have 3 papers,a group presentation, and several finals. I'm really not looking forward to these next few weeks. After finals crap is over with, I have to set up some academic advising appointments at CWU for next fall, talk with the Ellensburg PD and see if I can work with them in any way, and just start an overall de-stress from these last 2 death quarters. I have books to read, people's boyfriends to meet, a curriculum to set up, and a few Explorer events mixed in. Oh, can't forget the lunch dates that will happen now that Emily lives close and Mary is out of school. I've also started to get back into the running routine which is good, but painful. 

Talking about Hebrews, even the first chapter is "woah" material. It lays out some of Jesus' credentials. 

Long ago, at many times and in many ways, God spoke to our fathers by the prophets, but in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son, whom he appointed the heir of all things, through whom also he created the world. He is the radiance of the glory of God and the exact imprint of his nature, and he upholds the universe by the word of his power. After making purification for sins, he sat down at the right hand of the majesty on high, having become as much superior to angels as the name he has inherited is more excellent than theirs.

 Daaaang. I mean, I'd be happy to be as cool as an angel, but Jesus is so much higher than the angels!?!?!

Life 5/24/10

Apple Cup was amazingly fun. My partner and I and another team from our post placed 2nd in one of the scenarios! I'm also ridiculously glad I didn't have to do the PT test because of my stupid shoulder. The post is an absolutely amazing group of people. Our Captain, the other girl, is awesome. I got to know her a little better and she's just amazing. That's all I can say. My partner, Tyler, put up with SO much and he's fantastic. I really don't know what I would have done without him. The other guys are pretty much the best, too. Ahhhh it was a great weekend.

In other news, I've really been slacking on spending time in my Biblia. I don't feel as whole or refreshed without it, but I just haven't found the time. This week I added time to run, so I need to re-add that time with Jesus. Somebody remind me about that slash bug me if I don't. Please.

Need to do homework that's due at 7:30am tomorrow.

Humility. Respect.

Humility. I've talked about it before, but I'm learning about it in a whole new way.

I've been mentally struggling with the fact that out of the 5 people that showed up to practice for the 4 person honor guard, *I* was the one chosen as the alternate. I had my reasons for why I think I would be better, and I told a few close friends but you know, sometimes it's just good to be back-up...not always front and center. Today it turns out my dedication to the team--even though I was the alternate--has paid off and I'll be part of the legit honor guard. When I found out, I just got blown away by this. It's a huge evidence of God's grace and now I'm very excited.

Also, things are just different when you're on the bottom of the totem pole. These days in our society, people are so very casual. Especially in Seattle. But working in the PD, you have to be so so very respectful. When we're talking to someone of high rank, we have to stand at attention. When talking to any officer at all, it's always "yes sir" "no sir". Respect. And they definitely deserve the respect. Both our officer advisor and the lieutenant who helped us out today have been doing this for years and years and are amazing officers.

On a non-character related note, I'm having an awesome time working with the Explorers (RPDE). Every time we learn something new or run something, I keep thinking "yes, this is what I want to do with my life."